Self Love
I am a true believer that we can’t love others fully until we fully love ourselves. that sounds pretty cliche, I'm aware. But when you think about it, how do you expect someone to love you unconditionally, if they can't even love their ownflaws? How can you say you wont judge your friend for her/his imperfections, weird habits and corks if you can’t even look in the mirror in the morning without telling yourself you’re not skinny enough, too big here, and scold yourself for being tired, for being sad, for being angry. It’s so easy to be your own worst critic, judging every flaw, feeling, and thought.
Self-love doesn't always look like bubble baths, yoga poses, and smoothie bowls like you see on Instagram. Self-love is messy. It’s accepting those memories from your past that you wince at with shame. It’s letting yourself feel the pain that surfaces. It’s choosing yourself over anyone else every single morning. Its Forgiving yourself for overeating. It’s saying no when you can’t come over to help someone, or you can’t cover someone's shift. Sometimes, that calls for really awkward conversations. It all sounds good and easy til your telling your best friend or co worker you actually can’t do that thing you said you would do because you just don't have the energy for it. It’s being the person you needed when you were younger. But more importantly, the person you need right now. This may all sound selfish - but self love isn't selfish. Its simply filling your own cup first so you you're not pouring from an empty one.
Maybe it is yoga and a bath today. Or maybe its a night out with your friends. But that's the thing. It always looks different for every person. We all struggle with different things. Some struggle to be social, other struggle with alone time. For me, it was saying no without feeling bad about my decision. Finding balance in my life. With treating my body kindly both physically and mentally.
When i embarked on this journey. i didn’t really know where to start. Now, if i could talk to my younger self, i would say, start with every decision you make. Even the small ones. Whenever you need to make a decision ask yourself “what would someone who loves them-self do?" This could be as small as going to the gym or as big as quitting your job. This was monumental in my growth because it finally helped me say no to things i hated doing. But also made me do things i knew i should do, but simply didn’t make the time for. More importantly, it helped me check in with myself and my emotions and actually just take time to reflect on the decision rather then just blindly making them out of habit.
The best part -- when you finally start to love and put yourself first, the world will indeed love you right back. As within, so without. The people that come into your life will start to love and respect you. The people who don't will naturally fall away. The people you meet, the situations your in, will all start to unfold in your favor. Show up for yourself, and watch how quickly the universe responds to show up for you too.